HELP WANTED: POST HOLIDAY HOPE
THE HOLIDAY SEASON HAS ENDED, AND THE MAGIC IS NO LONGER IN THE AIR.
Many of us may be experiencing a sort of emotional whiplash. As quickly as the Holidays stopped, reality began again. We now face the difficult task of maneuvering through this life while resuming to some normalcy. Evidently, I am not a big fan of normalcy or reality. I am searching for a way to keep the magic of HOPE in our hearts as we care for loved ones who may be feeling that hope has vanished. I am in need of your help. I would like for all of us to band together and share ideas for keeping hope in the air and in our hearts. I am hoping that together we can all find ways to fight off sadness.
This heavy, oppressing sadness did not sweep over me like a Texas wind gust or engulf me like a coastal tidal wave. No, in fact, it was the exact opposite. It was more like being caught in the eye of an Oklahoma tornado where objects are sucked up and tossed around, only to land disheveled somewhere else. Unlike the little farmhouse that was sucked up in The Wizard of Oz, for me it was hope that was siphoned out of my soul the minute Christmas was over.
As long as Christmas was in the air, reality seemed to be held at bay. You see, hope took its place. Christmas music, movies, festivities, gifts – all things Christmas staved off the feeling of despair I felt as I realized that I am facing my mortality.
Please do not think that I am lacking faith. I am a faith-filled Christian. So I am opening myself up to criticism by any Christian who may think that sadness is a lack of faith. For so long, I have believed that, because I believe in God and because I believe He sent his only Son to earth as my Savior, I wasn’t allowed to be sad. So, as I type these words, I realize that I am exposing a vulnerable side of myself – the side that needs both hope and faith in order to face this season of my life.
“Why now?” I keep asking myself. Why am I now willing to expose this weakness of mine? Let’s blame it on COVID. I suppose this pandemic has illuminated my existing weaknesses. But, I believe it’s more than that. I believe that I have a responsibility to put into words certain feelings that others, who are far less fortunate than I, may be fearful to admit. I am not under HOSPICE care, nor am I receiving any life-extending chemotherapy or pain-killing palliative medicine. I’m just sad. I’m just depleted of hope. Granted, the cognitive side of me knows that this feeling is probably temporary, but I can’t help worrying about our patients for whom this loss of hope may not be temporary. However, they may have trained themselves to put the sadness on a shelf in order to avoid worrying their loved ones.
At the risk of sounding cliché, I want to find a way to bottle hope. I want to find a way to make everyone believe, in the depths of their souls, that life is really a journey replete with HOPE. It is not dependent on a season or a date. It is solely dependent on our ability to grasp it, hold on to it, and cherish it with gusto.
So, I am challenging you – everyone who is facing difficult times right now because you may be caring for someone who is facing the end of his or her life – to help me find a way to bottle hope. How can we help our patients and loved ones stave off feelings of despair? How can we make them feel year round the hope that accompanies the holiday season?
Please share your magic with us. If we network ideas, we may all be able to tap into that bottle of hope. How can we all keep HOPE at the forefront of the care we give our patients and loved ones? More importantly perhaps, how can we all keep HOPE in our hearts so that it spills out to everyone around us? How can we make sure that the presence of HOPE acts like a battery that charges rather than drains others?
Please help us by sending your ideas to Taylor Bradshaw at taylor@pdcrx.com.
PDC Rx Contributor: Joanna Rasp